Super-successful women leaders have learned to eliminate the good-girl habits, which rewarded them in their teens but stalled them in their professional lives.
From research, executive coaching and experience I have identified the new habits that propel women forward to achieve their personal visions of success without abandoning their values.
With an acknowledgement to Stephen Covey for his 1989 book, “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”, here’s a brand new version I created for women which compares the antiquated good-girl habits with their transformation into habits that level the playing field for women leaders.
Habit 1: Focus on Your Vision
Good Girl: Be Patient. Take what comes your way. People will recognize your hard work.
Woman Leader: Identify where you want to be in the future; Go after what you want; even if you believe you are not quite ready.
Habit 2: Effective Communication
Good Girl: Be lady-like, quiet and polite; speak when you are spoken to. let people come to you; don’t be assertive or bold
Woman Leader: Speak up and speak out concisely; influence and assert your leadership with a leadership voice
Habit 3: Leadership Presence
Good Girl: Take a back seat at the table; be modest and exclusively a ‘we’ manager
Woman Leader: Look, walk and talk like a leader; take credit with ‘I’ when it is you who achieved it, without forsaking the ‘we’ moments as well; engage and inspire your team to achieve their goals and yours
Habit 4: Forge Trusted Relationships
Good Girl: Stick with your comfortable circle of colleagues
Woman Leader: Consistently develops relationships with influencers and thought-leaders within and outside your organization; sharing, supporting, listening, learning and contributing to as well.
Habit 5: Confidence
Good Girl: Feeling worthy requires being perfect 100% of the time.
Woman Leader: Possess the belief that you will succeed and know that others believe that, too, without the pressure of making everything 100%+ perfect to prove it time and time again.
Habit 6: Emotional Intelligence
Good Girl: Reacts quickly to troubling work challenges and dynamics with hurt feelings, anger or fear; difficulty managing one’s emotions.
Woman Leader: Monitors one’s own and other’s emotions and integrates this with intelligence and empathy to manage, lead and collaborate effectively with one’s team, peers and leaders of the organization
Habit 7: Courage
Good Girl: Operates in one’s comfort zone, participating and contributing only in areas where the results are fairly predictable with a lack of interest in trying anything beyond the routine or appearing risky
Woman Leader: Eagerly welcomes new ideas, new challenges, new learnings, new opportunities and change even when there is a risk of failure
Explore the 7 Habits for Highly Effective Women Leaders at the upcoming 3-day program Women Lead with Powerful Conversations, June 13-15, at The George Washington University for yourself or other high-potential women leaders. For information, visit the program site.
Leslie Grossman, Leadership Consultant, Executive Coach and Facilitator
