wrote a strongly worded letter to the board regarding embattled CEO Santa Claus. Scrooge highlighted what he perceived as some serious issues regarding the infrastructure of the organization.
Well, this year brings another H-hour development for Christmas, Inc. It would seem as though Scrooge, who had been hired as the company’s COO, has been let go. Once again, www.equities.com has an exclusive look at the letter recently sent by the Chairman of the company to the other board members regarding the decision to let Mr. Scrooge go:
An Letter Regarding the Dismissal of COO Ebenezer Scrooge
As some of you may have heard by now, Christmas, Inc. has recently decided to part ways with COO and former board member Ebenezer Scrooge. Mr. Scrooge has long been a strong member of our company. Since taking over as COO, his tireless work has helped significantly improve the difficult financial situation for our company. The changes Mr. Scrooge made in the H.R. department, in particular, have been very important. Since taking over, Mr. Scrooge has overseen a reduction of work days lost to illness, vacation, or bereavement leave by over 75%.
However, as of Christmas Day, there has been a major overhaul coming from Mr. Scrooge’s department that does not align with my vision for the company anymore. Mr. Scrooge has opted to give the entire staff a day off on Christmas despite it going against company policy. He also approved several costly medical procedures on the corporate health plan for the child of one Bob Cratchit. Mr. Scrooge has been spearheading precisely the sort of initiatives that we had previously determined to be completely necessary to make the sort of changes this organization has long needed to finally start operating in the black and return some real value to our shareholders.
These sort of out-of-character actions were disappointing and led directly to Mr. Scrooge’s dismissal. When queried as to why he experienced this change of heart, Scrooge cited an experience that raised serious questions about his mental faculties and sanity. We’ve taken steps to get help Mr. Scrooge. Ultimately, we have decided that he needs to be institutionalized to help deal with this new “Christmas spirit” that has led to the changes in his personality.
I understand that this December reversal may draw some unfortunate parallels to last year’s dismissal of former CFO Mr. Grinch after the medical emergency involving his heart led to him simply giving away a number of important company assets to the citizens of Whoville. I would hope that we can all keep in mind that these two incidents, aside from their timing, appear to be entirely unrelated.
It’s a big week for the company and we’re hoping that we can all put aside this incident and move forward, focused on work. Thank you for your time.
Mr. Henry F. Potter